Sunday 12 February 2012

Gift for love Or Love for gift??

As the day of Valentine is approaching, I see most pages in newspapers with articles overflowing on love, sharing and everything on Valentine. Turn around everywhere and talks are on about the so-called selfless love, romantic songs falling on your ears from all directions and more so on the idea of gifting beloved ones with which greeting card sellers and flowerists or bouquet vendors would profit the maximum, not unbeknownst to us.

With regard to any celebration, be it birthday, wedding anniversary etc., Valentine's day included, I am totally apprehensive over the idea of gifting. The grown-up in me comprehends that the motive behind gifting or receiving gifts on V-day is to shower your affection on your love-lady/lad. Invariably, I also question if such a custom we have proudly acquired from the west and following with utmost concern than any other from our beautiful tradition has led us to somewhere where gifting has become obligatory. As I view my society, just like how people are enormously pride at watching a newly released movie on the first-show of the first-day, there is a sense of pride in the show-off that goes after  gifting. In other words, besides love, is it also an indication of an irresistible feel for gaining attention amongst friends or surroundings with the richness of the gifts shared?!

At the end of the much-hyped V-day, in case the cupid-struck youngsters are amicably demanded to share what have been showered with on their special day, it is nearly mandatory to bring out the bragger in them, to implicitly prove that he/she is the best lover in the world. Because, innately, deep inside, the world around judges people based on what they gift or have been gifted or they might be mocked at or looked down. 

Personally I feel that such customs have also been a grand factor in the increased expectations of today's world. I remember reading somewhere, 'You are what you gift'. And as with anything and everything, this could be viewed positively or negatively. On the negative front, on such occasions, you are determined by what you present. Sadly, today's 'selfless' love expects it, too.

Once when I shared with my classmates and teacher that it was my nephew's b'day, the immediate question from my teacher was, 'hey, what did you gift?'. I was dumb-stuck as soon as the question was posed at me because, the thought of gifting my two-year old nephew never crossed my mind, until I was asked. Most of the times I go out, I get something or the other for my loveable nephew with all love in the world, regardless of whether he needs/asks for it or not. The love I and my family have towards him is inexplicable. But when I was questioned about what I gave him on his b'day, I had no answers which had the possibility of creating a false impression on the affection I have for the baby. The whole day, I was pondering, how the perception over gifting has changed, over time.

Like I read today, I strongly believe that the concept of gifting has to never be obligatory and it is an involuntary instinctive feeling. Love is never compulsive, and so is presenting gift. In short, if you do not gift your valentine on the V-day and your amour loves you as much as always with no disappointments, then, I hope, it is one of the signs of selfless love and a less materialistic society.

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